Book Friday: Bittersweet Reality

 Poems and short stories

EBOOK   PRINT

Choosing to ignore the reality of my publications' lack of success, I assembled another collection for public entertainment.  Gorged on the sincere praises of my editor and several fans, I have once again allowed my ego to lead me by the carrot of fame it dangles before my eyes.  How can you refuse to follow the advice to publish given by someone who even takes the time to come up with the perfect title?

Bittersweet Reality has become a reality thanks to the efforts of my editor, Cindy Calloway who encouraged me to share these works and named them.  The artistic and technical abilities of Erika M. Szabo of Golden Box Books Publishing, are evident when you see this gorgeous cover, the beautiful interior of the book in all its forms and when you watch  the video below which she created. 

This collection has stories as well as poems offering my view of the world before me without my rose-colored glasses.

Cindy J. Smith

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Cindy has written poetry, and with every experience in life, she has found inspiration. Wife, Mother, and Grandmother, she has a myriad of beautiful memories to draw from. Never having been good at playing the part of "starving artist", she has had many careers, but her current one, an over-the-road truck driver with her husband, Dave, has provided amazing opportunities for inspiration in her later years.

Jasmine's Wish Fulfilled

Gift to My Angel

 

books2read.com/Jamines-Wish

 

    In 2011, I found myself traveling down a road I never dreamed I would.  I have written poetry as long as I can remember.  I write whatever comes into my head.  All feelings, all problems faced directly.  Some were based on personal experiences, others just on observations of the world.  I usually write in the first person, so no one would feel targeted should they happen upon one of my notebooks and read a poem. I wanted everyone to know they were not alone, even if I would not let them see my words. Because of one teacher, rarely would I let anyone outside of my immediate family see my scribbles. My daughter, Jasmine did send one of my poems out for a contest.  When it was selected to be published, she felt she had proof my poems should be in a book.  I let her send them off and when no response was ever received, I declared the proof on my side.  She read every thing I wrote and never stopped encouraging me to put them out into the world. But, I never let her talk me into sharing again.

   After her passing, I joined Facebook in an attempt to connect with her profile to share with her daughter when she grew up.  I found friends who helped me cope with my heartache and loneliness.  A chance share on social media of a poem led to the publication of my first book, Voices In My Head. The whole experience seemed like a whirlwind. So many friends supporting me, encouraging me to put my words out there.

   Their continuous spurring on was fed by my daughter's voice whispering in my mind.  Even from her perch in heaven, she was still urging me to publish, to share my thoughts with the world.  In her memory, and to quiet my friends, I did publish. I had no idea how many poems should be in a book, so I just put every one on my computer inside. With a feeling of excitement and dread, I sent my heart out into the world.

  The pats on the back from my internet friends fed my ego and I almost started to believe I might be a poet. Perhaps I really did write good poems, ones that would give hope to the reader.  As the novelty of the new book faded, the blinders I had been wearing disappeared.  Finding readers willing to purchase my poems was not going to be easy. 

  Lots of people are willing to say you write well and they really love your work, as long as they are able to read it for free.  Testifying to how much work and money goes into publishing seems to fall on deaf ears.  Although many will pay big bucks for a cup of coffee, spending money to help support a friend's dream is a completely different matter.  Even suggesting they could help in a way that is free, like telling people how much they enjoy your work or just sharing your promotions appears to be imposing too much.

  Still, I tried to believe in their praise.  The dream of being understood dangles like a carrot in front of my eyes.  Publish again, they said.  A second book will get people to buy the first one.  Well, I did publish again 2 years later.  Then I tried a sample book 2 years after that.  Funny, despite little interest, I published 2 more books.  This year, I finished the series that started with Voices In My Head. The tribute to my daughter's dream.  "QUIET! Please?" and "Silence" will join "Voices In My Head" and "They Won't Shut Up".  My personal viewpoint, my life in rhyme, collectively called Jasmine's Wish, finally fulfilled.  Will any care, probably not many.  But I will know I did my best to fulfill my daughter's dream and she will be smiling as she looks down on me.

JASMINE'S WISH

My daughter's wish
At last fulfilled
Path to success
Mostly uphill

Obstacles found
Along the way
Kept my desire
My faith, at bay

Her opinion
Kept me going
Though my doubt was
Overflowing

It took her death
To make it real
Poems no longer
Would I conceal

As she looks down
I hope she knows
My love for her
Forever grows

I dedicate
These books to her
Fulfilled this wish
Only for her

She's now a star
I wish upon
Shining on me
As I move on

Jasmine dear
You shine so bright
Hope these tomes bring
You some delight

 

Blog:
https://cindysvoices.blogspot.com
Website:
http://carternovels.com/author-cindy-j-smith.html
Twitter: https://twitter.com/cindysvoicesFB:  https://www.facebook.com/CindysVoices/
GOODREADS:
https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/6505989.Cindy_J_Smith
Pinterest:
https://www.pinterest.com/cindyjsmith1/