Showing posts with label YA. Show all posts
Showing posts with label YA. Show all posts

Friday, July 26, 2019

The ToiBox of Serials 1.2: Heart of the Golden Stag

Over on my personal blog, The ToiBox of Words, I’ve experimented with short fiction quite a bit. I’ve entered many blog writing contests and sometimes, just played around with it. In most cases, I’ve found myself expanding the stories I started on my blog and turning them into something more. All the stories in this series will be a product of what I started on my blog and then later added to in private. I will be sharing these stories in parts and encourage readers to leave positive or critical feedback (rude comments will be deleted). Perhaps, one day I’ll publish another personal anthology with these. Enjoy.



Side note: This story has never actually appeared on the ToiBox blog but was derived from a contest I entered and did not win. Still, the submission process was a good learning experience for me. This story is a retelling/reimagining with a twist. 


Heart of the Golden Stag, part 2
Read part 1 here.
The giggles and snaps of children playing in the alley below jolted Jamie’s body forward as dream and reality collided. Jamie rushed to the window, heart pounding and sweat dripping from her bushy unkempt brow. Below, little boys kicked a can back and forth between them as Jamie fought back tears. What a sad and stupid girl I can be sometimes. Shrugging her shoulders, she reached into the worn pockets of her men’s trousers to pull out a coin.
Tossing it down to the boys below, she called out in a gruff, “Bread and tea, young ones.”
The smaller of the two boys caught the coin, as usual, and then pulled the other along before replying, “Right away, Mr. Jaime. Be up soon.”
With the boys off to fetch her breakfast, Jamie quickly attended to her daily costuming. First, a few snips of hair along her forehead and at the nape of her neck. Then, a quick wash followed by fresh linen wraps to bind her breasts.
After chatting with the boys over tea, Jamie went to polishing her shoes with the intention of mulling over the day’s objectives. She’d lined up three marks the day before and was due for a good payday, yet her mind kept drifting back to her childhood. With her seventeenth birthday approaching, Jamie was plagued by nightmares and daydreams of the day she left home to become a boy.
She and her twin brother were turning twelve. Her older sister was a weeping doll, all dressed and made-up, in the corner sobbing through handkerchiefs as her stern and wrinkled betrothed pressed his hands upon her shoulder in mock-sympathy. Jamie watched the spectacle with dread, knowing that would be her fate upon her fifteenth birthday while her brother sniggered. He’d be heading off to the academy soon, to be educated and learn a trade.
Face warmed by the flickering candles, Jaime kept her eyes closed even after her brother blew out the flames as smoke wrapped around her head. She couldn’t bring herself to open her eyes and say goodbye to her childhood. From here on, her days would be filled with learning all the ways a wife should keep a husband happy. If that was love, Jamie wanted no part of it, yet she hoped there was more to it. She hoped to find an unconventional man not bound by Northern traditions.
With the snap of her father’s fingers, Jamie popped her eyes open to see him holding tightly onto the belt resting around his waist. Knowing he wouldn’t dare punish her in front of company, and on her birthday no less, Jamie seized the moment and ran into the woods, calling for a game of hide-and-seek. Only, she never hid.
Jamie grabbed the bundle she’d concealed days before and continued to run. She kept running until there was no chance of being able to turn back. 
To be continued...
Heart of the Golden Stag 2018 Copyright © Toinette J. Thomas 


Find out more about me, my work, and my inspiration at the following links:


Amazon | Goodreads The ToiBox of Words | YouTube | See a list of my other posts here.

Monday, June 10, 2019

The ToiBox of Serials 1: Heart of the Golden Stag

Over on my personal blog, The ToiBox of Words, I’ve experimented with short fiction quite a bit. I’ve entered many blog writing contests and sometimes, just played around with it. In most cases, I’ve found myself expanding the stories I started on my blog and turning them into something more. All the stories in this series will be a product of what I started on my blog and then later added to in private. I will be sharing these stories in parts and encourage readers to leave positive or critical feedback (rude comments will be deleted). Perhaps, one day I’ll publish another personal anthology with these. Enjoy.



Side note: This story has never actually appeared on the ToiBox blog but was derived from a contest I entered and did not win. Still, the submission process was a good learning experience for me. This story is a retelling/reimagining with a twist. 


Heart of the Golden Stag, part 1
     Rosy morning light shone down and warmed the dark olive flesh of a thin arm before it retreated beneath a blanket of golden hair. Shimmering in the pink light, the hair rippled as the body beneath wiggled and stretched awake. Soon, Aaron sat up with a wide yawn as he craned his neck to turn away, shielding his eyes from the glare. With a short sigh, Aaron flipped the long strands of hair over his shoulders before heading toward the washbasin.

     After washing and dressing, Aaron tip-toed around the confined quarters of his room, in the convent’s tower, to seek out his most prized, and secret, treasure. Wrapped tightly with blankets, Aaron pulled the bundle from underneath his bed and quietly revealed the cold and clear metallic glint of the looking glass.

     Staring at the feminine reflection before him, Aaron scrunched his nose before pulling his golden locks away from his shoulders to expose the boy disguised within. Aaron recalled the day the nuns first told him why he had to grow his hair long and wear girl’s clothing. Sister Norman sat the young Aaron in the middle of an expansive ivory hide and told him the story of his birth.

     It was the first night of the Twilight Moon, a full fall moon that rises in the East just as the sun is setting in the West, causing the sky to turn violet and allowing both the sun and moon to shine in unison for one enchanted hour. The Ivory Doe, the goddess of the North Woods, burst through the forest into our garden and pleaded with its eyes for us to conceal it. In the distance, the horns and treads of hunters could be heard and felt as they drew near. We hurried the large creature into our shed and then spread our numbers in all directions to throw-off the hunters’ tracking dogs. I alone remained; I was there when the Ivory Doe gave birth to her son, a golden fawn unlike any I’d ever seen.

     The mother stared into my eyes and called me forward. I placed my hand upon her antlers as her son fed at her teat. Mentally, she conveyed her story. Chased for months by the hunters seeking her magic. Being with child, she conserved her magic instead of using it to dispel the hunters. As her life began to reach its end, she wanted to make sure that her son would live. She impressed upon me that until her child reached full maturity, he was at risk of having his magic stolen. Should he live to see that day, he would become invulnerable and powerful. If he should find a human worthy of his love, he would grant them a great blessing. With her last pained breath, the Ivory Doe enveloped her fawn in white light and then faded away, leaving behind an infant boy, wrapped in her preserved hide.

     Hearing his name being called from elsewhere in the convent, Aaron quickly concealed his mirror and rushed off to assist the sisters. All these years, they had been so good to him, helping him to remain hidden and teaching him what they could of the Ivory Does. As Aaron’s eighteenth birthday drew near, his toes and fingers constantly tingled with anticipation as magic pulsed through his body. Aaron longed to love the nuns as they loved him, but their shelter had confined him and suppressed the transformation he yearned for.
To be continued...
Heart of the Golden Stag 2018 Copyright © Toinette J. Thomas 


Find out more about me, my work, and my inspiration at the following links:


Amazon | Goodreads The ToiBox of Words | YouTube | See a list of my other posts here.

Wednesday, December 5, 2018

Would you read this? Vol.3 #OurAuthorGang


Welcome back. See volume 1 and 2 of this series, at the links provided.

I’ve written a lot of short stories in the last few years. Some have been published in a collection while others are simply awaiting their time to shine. As I considered how to organize my collections, I began to wonder if the stories themselves are worth reading on their own. As a collection, these short stories have the benefit of being part of something greater, but I want to know “would you read these stories?” if they were presented on their own. That’s also when I begin to consider that I write blurbs for the books I release, but I don’t write blurbs for individual stories in a collection, a tagline usually does the job. Well, that’s about to change. In this series, I’ll be sharing unpublished blurbs to stories that may or may not yet be released. These blurbs are not meant to be used to pitch or sell these stories. This is just a practice on the concept of writing a blurb? I just want to know if the blurbs are any good. I may also offer some ideas of what cover designs for these stories may look like. I hope you enjoy this adventure.

For the third post in this series, I thought I’d start with the blurb for the first romance story (a YA romance at that) I ever wrote. It, like the last story, is included in my collection, Legend of the Boy, In the Window, and Other Short stories. However, the version of the story that appears in that collection, is quite different from the story I wrote back in high school.

Yes, this is the first story I published that had been originally written during a time in my life before I realized just how important writing is to me. Back in high school, I wrote short stories and poems to amuse myself or sell to classmates who wanted to impress someone. They’d give me an idea and some specs, and I’d provide them with a story or poem. I had a strict “no academia” policy. If I thought someone was trying to pass off something I wrote for an English assignment, I’d come clean. Only one person ever attempted it, but they didn’t go through with it.

Encounter is another story I presented to my old writing group, which at the time gave me many pointers on how to present it better. I ended up tweaking the story a bit to suit myself. It’s supposed to be a love at first sight story, but I never felt right about it. I guess you could say, I’m just not a believer in love at first sight. I reworked the story to show that my characters had at least encountered each other one other time before “falling in love.” At just around 1700 words, I’m very proud of the way this story has evolved.

Below is the proposed blurb for the story and two book cover mock-ups for you to vote on. These are rough drafts that will never be produced, but I’d still like to know your thoughts on making them better, if you have any.

What’s a girl to do when the object of her affection looks like a golden demi-god and she’s as plain as grain? 

For Talia, she’s decided to chase down destiny and stare into his dreamy, copper eyes just once more before she likely faints from exhilaration. 

Will Talia discover love or disappointment when she seeks out her next "chance" encounter?

Forms response chart. Question title: Which do you prefer?. Number of responses: 4 responses.
Results as of 12/6. You can still vote.

Don’t be shy. Your feedback is welcomed, but please be nice. 😌

Find out more about me, my work, and my inspiration at the following links:

Amazon | Goodreads The ToiBox of Words | YouTube | See a list of my other posts here.

Click here to read more posts at our Blog Post Gallery


COMMENTS 

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Eva Pasco

1 month ago  -  Shared publicly
 
I think your blurb is on point and inviting!
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Ruth de Jauregui via Google+

1 month ago  -  Shared publicly
 
Toinette Thomas​ shares another story blurb and two cover choices on #OurAuthorGang today. Which one do you like best?
 
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Ruth de Jauregui

1 month ago  -  Shared publicly
 
I don't even like romance and the blurb made me stop short and think "Wow, that sounds great!" Great job Toi!!
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Thanks, Ruth. That means a lot.

Chris Weigand

1 month ago  -  Shared publicly
 
Great blurb. I would read the book.
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Thanks, Chris.

Chris Weigand via Google+

1 month ago  -  Shared publicly
 
Another excerpt from Toi
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Toi Thomas via Google+

1 month ago  -  Shared publicly
 
Today, I offer another blurb and two more book covers for you vote on. #OurAuthorGang
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P. J. Mann shared this via Google+

1 month ago  -  Shared publicly
 
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P. J. Mann

1 month ago  -  Shared publicly
 
Great post as usual. I don't know whether love at first sight happens or not, I guess I did fall in love with my husband almost immediately, and it was something that mostly happened in a subconscious way. I guess it differs from person to person ,as we all are different from one another. I love the first cover, for some reason it attracts my attention
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Thanks for the feedback. I definitely think attraction at first sight happens a lot, but love is different. Still, as you say, everyone is different. If someone finds love, who care if it takes years or happens instantly.

Erika M Szabo

1 month ago  -  Shared publicly
 
Great post Toi, I like the new cover :) Love at first sight happens only in my magical realism trilogy when the characters are mesmerized by magic. Otherwise, first comes chemistry, and then getting to know the person and falling in love :)
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I agree with you for the most part. Thanks for the feedback, but both of these covers are mock-ups. Which one, #1 or #2 did you like more?
 
+Toi Thomas I voted for #2 :)

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