Why People Prefer Sugar-Coated Lies Over Hard Truths
"People say I don't look a day over 40," she boasted. "Don't you agree?"
"And you believe them?"
"Well... yes. Why would they lie?"
I nod, smile, but don't say anything. I don't lie or sugarcoat, and she knows it. Her cheerful mood turns sour, quickly says bye, and walks away.
If there would be a think bubble visible over my head, she could read my thoughts, Her face is smooth but clearly paralyzed by the regular Botox injections, she colors her gray hair and wears tons of makeup, but her turkey neck and droopy knees show her age about seventy. Why is she so desperate to hold onto what's impossible? Luckily, our thoughts are invisible.
People instinctively protect their self-esteem. Hearing a flattering lie feels safe and boosts confidence, even if it’s false. Confronting a harsh truth can trigger shame, guilt, or anxiety, so many unconsciously opt for reassurance instead.
Truth often demands action—admitting faults and putting in effort to improve. Change is uncomfortable and uncertain. A sugar-coated lie allows you to stay in your comfort zone without facing the work required for genuine growth.
In everyday interactions, kindness and cohesion often trump blunt honesty. White lies lubricate social bonds, avoid awkwardness, and prevent hurt feelings. We’d rather preserve relationships than risk conflict by delivering unwelcome truths.
Humans evolved in tight-knit groups where harmony meant survival. Upward-trading flattery kept alliances strong. Culturally, many societies prize “saving face,” so people learn early to prioritize gentle feedback over direct criticism.
Personally, instead of sugar-coated lies, I rather hear the truth that helps me look at things realistically and helps me grow as a person.
Erika loves to dance to her own tunes and follow her dreams, introducing her story-writing skills and her books that are based on creative imagination with themes such as magical realism, alternate history, urban fantasy, cozy mystery, sweet romance, and supernatural stories. Her children’s stories are informative and educational, and deliver moral values in a non-preachy way.
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